Visiting after baby

I've been thinking about writing this post for a while now and I've finally gotten around to it.  After a friend or family member has a baby everyone wants to go visit and see the beautiful bundle of joy.  New parents everywhere are just starting out on the road to parenthood and have been shell shocked with to little football that has been handed to them after a mere 48 hours under the watchful eye of medical professionals.  If you were anything like Brendan and me after both of our kids you looked at the nurses and wondered if they too were coming home with you, along with all the diapers and wipes they send home.

  Having a baby is a beautiful yet traumatic event.  It doesn't matter how the baby enters into this world, it turns your world upside down.  It could be your first or tenth child, again same story, different day.  After the baby arrives everyone wants to come visit and see your precious bundle.  That's all fine and dandy but here are a few things visitors need to remember that the new parents will be oh so thankful for.  

1.  This visit isn't about YOU, it's about THEM.  Make it short and snappy, don't linger.  The new parents are worried about their new baby not entertaining guests.  

2. Bring a meal, always bring a meal.  Offer to hold the baby while the parents eat.  If they decline, put the meal in the fridge for them.  Unless they invite you, do not assume you are invited for dinner.  See #1 about entertainment.

3.  If you are an out of town guest and plan to stay for a day or two, offer to stay elsewhere.  There are always nearby hotels.  Let me further address this, unless you were my mom or stepmom I was not comfortable with anyone helping me and my postpartumness...(Brendan however is lumped in here, that of course is by default). Don't assume that a guest room is open for business after a baby is born.  Bring in meals to cook, refer to #1 in regards to entertaining.  

4. Even if you are from out of town and staying elsewhere, give the parents a break.  Leave for a while and let them sleep when the baby sleeps.  I don't care who you are if there are guests in the house I feel like I have to entertain.  I will not nap if you're here.  

5. In town guests,  give the new parents notice prior to your visit.  10 minutes is not enough notice, at least it wasn't for me.  I wanted to at least shower and our dog goes nuts when someone is at the door.  Baby sleeping + dog barking = no bueno.  Call and make an appointment to visit, never just stop by! 

6. When you do visit ask if the new parents need anything done.  Is there laundry to be folded, does the new mom need 10 minutes to take a shower?  The best visit I ever got was after I had Drew, I was overwhelmed and my older sister called and asked if I had showered that day.  Of course I hadn't.  She came over and held Drew while I showered and did my makeup and hair.  It was so refreshing, I felt like a new person.  It's the little things like that, that make new moms feel so much better and they appreciate so very much.  

Visitors for a new family can be a stressful and very emotional time.  Be conscious, be aware, and above all its about the new family and the precious new life that has entered this world.  

Finding that perfect piece to remember the past

  In March of 2009 Brendan and I lost a baby when I was twelve and a half weeks pregnant.  We had already had our first appointment, heard and saw a strong heartbeat and our little jelly bean was growing away.  A mere three weeks later we received devastating news that our baby had passed and I had a missed miscarriage.  You can read about our journey of losing that baby from receiving the news, how we decided to have a D&C,  starting the healing process, realizing that healing takes time, and getting some answers.

  After losing our first baby we were fortunate to conceive again and once again I lost that baby at seven weeks.  If you've read my blog for anytime at all you know that Brendan and I have been blessed with two healthy and happy children and although we suffered two very heart breaking loses we knew that God had a plan all his own for our family.

  Losing two babies has always stuck with me and will always be a part of who I am.  I always remember their due dates and wonder what that child would have been like.  The one thing I do know is that my children have two very special guardian angels that look out for them daily.  If we wouldn't have suffered through that very tough time, Drew and Kate wouldn't have been here, and I can't imagine life without my two little blondies.

  The one thing I have always wanted is something for myself to carry with me or to wear that would symbolize ALL of my children, this including the babies that Brendan and I have in heaven.  I've never been able to quite find the right thing.  Dates don't seem fitting because I don't want to dwell on the sadness of those dates, but rejoice that we have two angels watching over us.  Today, I was on GroopDealz and I found the perfect bracelet.  A simple silver bracelet you can add initials or names with either baby feet or hearts following the names or initials.

 I've asked the seller to place a heart at the beginning of my bracelet to symbolize our two babies we have lost, then follow that by Drew's name and a baby feet hand stamp and then Kate's name and a baby feet hand stamp.  My babies may not all be with me here on earth, but they will now be on my wrist and are forever in my heart and a part of our family.

 Have a very happy and safe memorial day weekend.  Thank you to all those who serve or have served to protect our freedoms.  

2012 a year in review

2012 was an amazing year and our family was so blessed with a new addition, some awesome travel and lots of fun time as a family of four. Let's take a look back at our year. In January we got ready to transition from one to two kiddos.  I also entered my third trimester of being pregnant with Kate whom I had dubbed "peanut" while pregnant with her.  We didn't know that she in fact was a girl while I was pregnant.

In February I started planning Drew's Sesame Street birthday party.

We also moved Drew to his big boy bed and he did amazingly well through the transition! We took full advantage of the unseasonably warm weather and spent time outside in February, in IOWA!

March brought some nursery progress, our Barbados travel review and our sweet Drew turned two years old.

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April had huge changes in our family as we welcomed Katherine Ellen into our family.

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In June I chatted about introducing Kate to Drew and how our transition at home had been going.  We took Drew on his first train ride and it was a huge hit!

In July I finally got around to sharing pictures of Drew's Sesame Street birthday party....Slacker alert!

Kate had already hit the 2 month mark!

We also spent the majority of the month of July in our backyard enjoying the awesome weather.

In August Brendan and I traveled to Puerto Rico and I returned to work. 

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September we were quite busy with family birthdays and my little brother got married!

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In October we visited the pumpkin patch, and I gave everyone an update as to what Drew was up to these days and Kate hit the 5 month mark.

November brought on Thanksgiving and a need to help me decorate.  We are nearly finished with our basement renovation and I couldn't be happier!

December was all about Christmas in our house! We even had a white Christmas this year with a snow day coming just one week before the big day.  I know I shared our Christmas card late this year but it's still our 2012 Christmas card. 

2012 was a great year!  We were so blessed with health and happiness, we are looking forward to all that 2013 has in store for our family.

 

What's in a name

    When I was pregnant with both Drew and Kate, Brendan and I knew we wanted our children to have family names. Brendan has both of his grandfather's names as his middle names and I'm just one of a kind with no family significance to my name. 

    Drew's full name is Andrew Davis after Brendan's Papu(Greek grandfather) and Davis after my maternal great grandfather. When I was pregnant with Kate we once again came up with both a boy and girl name, after throwing many, many different girl names around we landed on Katherine with the nickname of Kate. We wanted a traditional full name that she could choose to be called with a more modern nickname that also "fit" with Drew. I always contemplated how it would look on our Christmas card each year. With Drew we always call him Drew, we hardly ever call him Andrew, well except for those few moments when the full and middle name come out when he's doing something he shouldn't. So we knew that if in fact peanut as we had dubbed Kate was a girl she would be called Kate 99% of the time.

  After we had decided on Katherine we wanted a family name for a middle name. Katherine is not a family name on either side, so I was on the hunt. One night when pregnancy insomnia was in full effect it hit me like a ton of bricks....ELLEN! My little sister Karin's middle name is Ellen and I would love to name my daughter after one of my sister's. I have 3 siblings, 1 brother, 1 older sister and 1 younger sister. My brother and younger sister are actually my step siblings. Their dad and my mom were married when my younger sister was 2, my brother was 5, I was 6 and my older sister was 11. Since that day we have formed a bond that is unmatched, our love is unconditional and when naming my daughter I couldn't think of a more beautiful tribute to my younger sister and my parents than to name her after Karin.

(The whole gang with our spouses; from LtoR my brother his fiance, Brendan, moi, my brother in law, my older sis, my younger sister's fiance and my younger sister Karin)

  
  My parents took a huge leap of faith when blending four children together all those years ago. Our relationships have flourished and blossomed and my siblings are my best friends. Karin now lives in London and that morning of April 18th when we were blessed to find out that Kate was in fact a healthy little girl I called my sister in London and we both cried as I told her we had named her Katherine Ellen after her. As I told my mom and step dad what we had decided to name our precious little girl tears welled up in their eyes. The many years of worry that their children may never have close relationships was put to rest. Karin and I may not share the same DNA, we were not knitted together in the same womb but through and through we are sisters, we are best friends and she is now my daughters namesake and it warms my heart to know that Kate will know how very much I love her aunt Karin.

39 weeks

This is the last pregnancy update! Having a scheduled c-section is quite nice, we know when we're going in, we have Drew taken care of, we have our bags packed, Peanut's bag packed. Now we just wait 4 days.

It's a bit funny how we chose Peanuts arrival date because you can chose any date after 39w. Since April 17th is technically tax day this year and Brendan is in the financial planning business and the 16th and17th are
super busy days since people can still contribute to certain investments and get tax deductions for 2011. It just so happened my OB was scheduled to be in the OR all day on the 18th, so that's how Peanut's birthday was chosen.

I've now hit the point in pregnancy where I'm just ready, ready to know if I have another son or daughter. Ready to have my baby on the outside and for my body to start to recover.

Here's to a very uneventful and healthy pregnancy! Time has flown by!

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We'd like to welcome

Drew's little sister to our family! Katherine Ellen arrived today at 9:11am weighing 6lbs. 6oz. And measuring 18 inches long. Kate is simply perfect, Brendan and I are truly in awe of the miracle God has given us once again.



We are over the moon in love with our daughter.

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37 & 38 weeks

My lovely self portrait. You can see a bit of nursery too.

On Saturday I'll hit 39 weeks.................holy crap we're going to have a baby soon........... Ok, I needed a moment. These past few weeks have been pretty low key in regards to pregnancy, however life has been super busy, and our toddler is more energetic than ever!

Pregnancy wise everything seems to be right on track, although the one huge difference I am noticing is the pressure I feel on my pelvic bone. Holy guacamole people, this is no joke! I didn't have any pressure with Drew, he was sunny side up and apparently that can make all the difference in the world because Peanut is not and oh me oh my, my pelvic bone feels like it could snap in two at any second. Needless to say, at 38 weeks pregnant how comfy can you really be?

The one thing that is eating me up inside is the huge amount of mom guilt I have for having a second child. Now don't get me wrong we love this child and couldn't be happier but I have this guilt that I'm taking something away from Drew. I fear he'll resent me, feel rejected or unwanted because we bring a new baby home. To know when I leave the morning of my c-section and I'm literally going to turn his world up side down, breaks my heart. Any moms of 2 or more want to give any wise words of advice, did you have guilt?

I know everything I'm feeling is probably normal, and I'm probably a wee bit overly emotional at this point, but I can't help it at this point.

My other nagging feeling is fear, I am absolutely terrified to have another c-section. Drew's delivery was not pleasant and feeling the doctors cut me open was awful. My fear keeps rising and as this delivery comes closer and closer those memories of his delivery become more and more vivid. You'd think 2 years would allow me to forget what happened and the painful delivery I had, but it hasn't. I've just been praying daily that God puts a calm over my body that day and takes away the fear and anxiety.

So there you have it folks, I'll have one more weekly update and then it's go time!



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36 weeks

I hit the 36 week mark today, I'm actually on schedule this week. I have a little over 3 weeks before Peanut arrives and time seems to be flying by. The nursery is now 99% complete. I'm just waiting on a pillow from Etsy and we shall call it a day.

This past week I had my 36 week appointment and had a growth ultra sound that happened to also be a 3D ultra sound. Peanut has a lot of hair and really chubby cheeks. The ultra sound tech estimated that Peanut weighs 6lbs.4oz. and his/her legs are measuring in the 95%. Someone tell me how our child has long legs? I'm 5'6 on a good day and Brendan is 5'8 those heights do not equal a tall child.

This week I can tell swelling has started to kick in. My face is getting rounder and my ankles are slowly becoming cankles. I'd like to think my thighs are swelling too, but I'm pretty sure that's all the ice cream Peanut has NEEDED over the last 9 months.

Other than that, not much going on here. Peanut's bag is packed, both a boy and girl coming home outfit have been purchased, washed and packed. I also packed a couple of neutral sleepers and swaddle blankets to snuggle Peanut while in the hospital.

I hope everyone is having a fabulous weekend!


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33 & 34 weeks

Once again I'm behind in my posting. Life seems to really be getting in the way of my blogging efforts. Although this past weekend we had Drew's birthday party and that is a huge check on my long list of things to do before Peanut arrives.

Let's see 33 & 34 weeks, it's once again been pretty uneventful, which this whole pregnancy had been. It's so refreshing not having to worry about my heart this time around. My beta blocker helps with my palpitations and knowing my leakage is just fine and dandy is music to my ears.

I have noticed since Peanut has gotten bigger my appetite has decreased considerably. It's getting a bit uncomfortable to eat a big meal, so I've been sticking to small meals. I've also had a craving for cereal once again this pregnancy. We currently have 9 boxes of cereal in our house. I should not be trusted in the cereal aisle at the grocery store.

These past couple of weeks I've started washing newborn clothes, burp clothes and blankets. I am still amazed at how tiny the little onesies are, and that Drew actually fit in them. We are not finding out the sex of Peanut until he/she is born so we have purchased a boy and girl going home outfit. I then am going to take a couple of neutral sleepers to the hospital for Peanut while we stay at there.

As for the hospital stay, we now have all of Drew's arrangements made. The hospital I'm delivering at this time around is about 35 minutes away so my parents will be helping with the little man. Brendan is planning on bringing him to the hospital one morning to meet his new sibling. Other then that time he'll be enjoying time with his cousins and playing at day care, which he loves.

My question to all you readers, what would be a small gift Peanut could get Drew to give him in the hospital? Drew needs absolutely NOTHING, we just had his birthday party and we have had a hard time finding a couple of gifts to get him. Any fun ideas, I'm all ears!




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Nursery progress

   With us knee deep in house renovations, room changes and paint I thought I'd update with what's happening in Peanut's nursery. So a recap, we moved Drew to our guest room, and that room is done. I'm going to take you all on a video tour very shortly of this new digs. We are then adding a second living room, bedroom, storage areas, office space and bathroom in the basement. This will take our house from a 3 bed 2 bath to a 4 bed 3 bath house with a guest room. Otherwise out of town grandparents would be SOL when coming to stay.

    So anyway, back to the progress on the nursery. When I was first pregnant with Peanut we knew we wouldn't find out the sex until birth as we did with Drew, but I knew I wanted to change up the nursery from what it was when I was pregnant with Drew.

  My vision is a gray, white and yellow modern feeling nursery with more texture than color, but still have pops of color here and there.  So I ran with it, and found some inspitation images.

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I looked everywhere for gray and yellow bedding, and the ones that I found the price was outrageous, so my mom and I found some damask gray and white fabric at a local fabric store and she is making the bumper.

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The bumper is going to have shunshine yellow ties and a white crib skirt with yellow ribbon as well.

  We then went looking for a crib skirt and I found one at Pottery Barn Kids that was fabulous and in my opinion to die for.

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I ordered this crib skirt online and of course it's back ordered until May 10th.  BOOO HISSSS!!  So again my mom is going to make it.  I'm so thankful my mom can sew like she does.  The fitted crib sheet I also ordered from there, yeah backordered until May too.  I guess great minds think alike and everyone is loving yellow these days. 

The nursery will not be complete without wall hangings, so I went my handy dandy Etsy to find some adorable nursery art.  Once again my love Etsy did not disappoint! I found a gray and yellow alphabet that is oh so cute, with the crib and side table both being black, I thought this would tie everything together.

The seller of this print is Fancy Prints, go check out this adorable shop!

I now was on the hunt for a print or prints to hang above the crib, and I lucked out and went with the animal theme again with these 4 prints.

These prints can be found at Zeppi Prints on Etsy.

The nursery does seem to be coming together, we have our yellow and white rocker coming this week, and the curtains arriving the week following.  Nothing like waiting until 35 weeks pregnant to get everything in order...  I'm hoping everything comes together as well as it has in my head.  Stay tuned for Drew's new room and the nursery completion.